Bringing Up Bates "Tough Decisions & Large Ambitions"
- Chad, Erin, and Carson join Zach, Whitney, and Bradley for dinner. They enjoy talking about their little boys and their soon-to-arrive baby girls. Bradley loves giving cousin Carson hugs and kisses.
- Back at the Bates house, a somber Nathan knocks on his parents’ bedroom door for some “large talk.”
- “Ashley, she’s one of the best girls that I’ve ever met,” says Nathan. “Neither one of us have anything about the other one that we look at and don’t like, but we’ve come to the decision that we’re going to separate.” He and Ashley will still be friends and talk as much as they can, but they will no longer be a couple.
- Gil asks if their relationship is “on hold.” Nathan clarifies: He and Ashley broke up, but the decision was mutual and was on good terms.
- “Our main goal has been to try to pray about it and find out what God’s will is for us,” says Nathan.
- Nathan tears up as his parents give him a big hug. “It’s life,” he says, smiling through the tears.
- In Nashville, Tennessee, Lawson meets with an agent name Charles Dorris to discuss his budding music career and the tour he is planning for fall.
- “I think the future for Lawson is pretty bright,” says Charles. “Though there’s a lot of steps between where he is now and major stardom as a music artist, I think he’s on the right path.”
- The Bates heat their home with a wood stove, and their water comes from a spring. Since Gil is in the tree business, firewood is free. Three weeks after his surgery, he joins the boys outside to split some wood. “Hey, Dad, the ‘70s is calling; they lookin’ for their glasses,” jokes Jackson when he sees his father’s old school protective glasses.
- In the midst of the chaos of nearly a dozen guys chopping firewood, Gil accidentally runs over the front tire of Judson’s new bike with his truck. “Judson was probably as crushed as his bike was,” says Lawson. Thankfully, Gil is able to fix it.
I could feel the heartbreak in a personal way when Nathan was sharing his decision with his parents. Been there, felt the hurt. But then Gil said something that was so true and so wise, the part about trusting God's will. If Nathan can just hang on to that, that will give great peace. Praying for him to find the right one in God's timing.
ReplyDeleteHow does anyone know what God's will is? That has always puzzled me, why some people live their lives assuming that God is directing everything that happens to them. If we are all given free choice, it stands to reason that we are also at the mercy of time and chance and the personal decisions we make every day.
DeleteI live my life believing God is directing me because I ask him to and I seek him through prayer and meditation of his word. It doesn't mean everything is always peachy and works out wonderfully but the act of seeking God and trusting him to lead and guide you is a decision made from free will. I'm pretty much a constant work in progress but when I give my hardships, worry, depression, bitterness, and even joy up to God He has never left me high and dry. Sometimes he has walked me through the pain, other times he takes it away and gives me something better. Often he just asks that I wait and trust that he will "never leave or forsake me" I would write more but my baby is crying and it's my turn to feed him.
DeleteYou know you are in Gods will by the peace that He gives you about the situation. He will show you His will through counseling, prayer and feeling that peace. We have a free will so we can choose not to walk in the will of God. But a truly happy, peaceful life only comes by doing things His way.
DeleteI know right? I guess it all lays in how strong our faith is?
DeleteIt's really something I think you have to experience to understand. As a Christian, I have had times in my life where I specifically asked God to show me His will in a matter, and He did it in ways that were way different than what I expected or could have imagined.
DeleteWhat ways, out of curiosity?
DeleteAwww, very sad for Nathan and Ashley. Zach has been through the same heartbreak, and I'm sure he'll help guide Nathan through this hard time. Nathan is such a sweetheart, very difficult to see him so sad.
ReplyDeletezach has been through that same heartbreak??? when????
DeleteHe was in a courtship with another girl before meeting Whitney.
DeleteHe was originally courting Sarah Reith back in 2011 or 2012, but she called off the courtship. He met Whitney shortly after that and they got married in December 2013.
Deletehe courted a girl before whitney
DeleteBefore Whitney he courted a girl Sarah Reith and they broke up and I believe if I recall that Zach went to sonic where Whitney worked and that's where he met her and she helped him get over his heartbreak
DeleteZach was in a courtship that ended. Then he met Whitney and the two became best friends before falling in love. It was such a "normal" story of two young people meeting.
DeleteIn July of 2012, he and the girl (Sarah Reith) he had been courting for a few months, decided to end their courtship. If you want more info you can google "zach bates and Sarah reith".
DeleteSarah Reith courtship.
DeleteBefore Whitney, Zach courted Sarah Reith. She ended the courtship.
DeleteZach courted a girl by the name of Sarah before he met Whitney. It was on an episode of 18 kids and counting
DeleteZach was in a courtship with Sarah Reith before he met Whitney. I think it was in 2011 or 2012, but only lasted a short while.
DeleteSeveral years ago, she was counting a young girl, whose name is Sarah. They broke up a few weeks after the relationship began.
DeleteI like that Kelly & Gil were told after Nathan and Ashley had broken up...not before. That shows that Nathan & Ashley were treated as adults and were able to have that conversation privately. I love how much trust both Kelly and Gil puts into their kids...allow them to make their own decisions, their own mistakes, etc. oh and whoever did Bradley's hair with the little Mohawk, it was absolutely adorable!!
ReplyDeleteI agree, petfectly said!
DeleteI so agree, I think the over-the-top-chaperoning that the Duggars practise is creepy. I remember it was Jessa's wedding day, and she and Ben went to the church to do some last minute prep and they had a sibling to tag along as a chaperone... I laughed out loud, I thought that was so ridiculous.
DeleteThe Bates family is a breath of fresh air! They demonstrate so humbly that you can have strong convictions yet be reasonable and sensible at the same time....
DeleteFelt so bad for Nathan had a feeling that was going to be the decision they came to but it's still sad. My heart broke watching him cry and bound to mom for his hug. He does seem like such a sweetheart and it was hard to see him so sad. I agree that Zach having been through the heartbreak would probably be one of the biggest helpers for Nathan through that time. I was a little surprised that Nathan decided to allow the camera's there for that emotional moment with his parents. However I thought that was good it shows the viewers they are like everyone else and could encourage others going through a tough time to let people in. I would love to see a conversation between him and Zach so it will be interesting to see if that was filmed because I would guess they had one. Loved how Bradley kept kissing and hugging Carson that was so cute. I wish Nathan and Ashley both the best of luck as they find the one they were meant to be with the one god has for them.
ReplyDeleteI'm just glad they didn't film the break-up moment; some things should just be private. This was probably just enough, and heart-breaking. I don't need to see a such talk between Nathan and Zach, but if either of them refer to giving each other support, that'd be all right. Condolences, Nathan and Ashley
DeleteOk. Nathan got me. I started crying for him. He made a tuff decision but ultimately he let God lead his decision. Nathan you are so sweet and I know God has a beautiful woman waiting in the future to become your wife. Gil and Kelly you handled his heartbreak so beautifully. Thank you for sharing this raw moments with the public because I am learning from you. My children have not started dating yet but I am incorporating some values that I have learned from you into my everyday life. Thank-you!
ReplyDeleteAs expected.
ReplyDeleteIt was for the best: they're both good people but if they got married either one of them would have to sacrifice too much of their identity, and that's not good.
They say opposites attract and this means that on the level of feelings it's not impossible to have feelings for someone who's different from you, but when you're headed towards marriage and a lifelong commitment, you should choose someone who's more similar too you, otherwise you'll start resenting each other.
So they did break up...now the question is: Do they get back together since they continue to be friends? She was at the graduation party and the Bates family posted a birthday message to her on her birthday...
ReplyDeleteI was wondering the same thung
Deleteso sorry for Nathan but i'm sure Ashley hurts also. I'm sure they both made what they thought was the right decision
ReplyDeleteThey were in New York with Ashley's family on memorial day so they may get back together.
ReplyDeleteThey say they stayed friends so I don't think they're back together just because they saw each other in group context once within 4 months...
DeleteYeah but u don't travel from Tennessee to New York for a holiday and spend it with another friend's family if your just friends. You spend the holiday with your family. They may still be talking through their decision.
DeleteAgreed Annonymous 1:49. There really is no such thing as being "just friends". Has no one on here seen " When Harry Met Sally?" LOL!!
DeleteFor me it's not strange to go spend holidays with friends' families. ;)
DeleteI'm confused, so please someone help me out. I do understand the difference between courtship and dating. However, I once heard a Duggar (can't remember who) explain that with dating "you leave a piece of your heart behind each time you date someone." Isn't that what happens in courtship, if it doesn't result in marriage??? The Bates definitely seem to be somewhat less sheltering. Private phone calls and I think some of the couples have been alone together. Zach and Whitney kissed before marriage. Nathan and ashley held hands.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I think that the Bates are more modern.
DeleteThe Duggars are way more controlled, even in the way they show their feelings. You see the Duggars hugging each other, interacting affectionately with each other regularly, while the Duggars don't show it that much.
It was Josh that said that. Ironic, huh?
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