Babies and children are of course a blessing, but they’re not the only thing in life. Michaela and Brandon can live full lives of purpose without procreating. From the crowd that often says everything is god’s will and god has a reason for everything, why be so unaccepting of what god is clearly doing (by not doing) in this couple’s life?
I think that you can live a full life without children. However, that usually happens when a couple makes the active choice not to procreate. It's heartbreaking when you cannot add to your family when every fiber of your being yearns to be a mother (or father). Based on show episodes, Michaela is struggling with her infertility and using her faith to cope. Trying to figure out why she can't have children isn't challenging God's will, it's determining if she or Brandon has a medical condition that prevents it. The Keilens even seem reluctant to undergo any fertility procedures like IVF. Michaela seems open to adoption, so that may be where God is directing their lives.
Anonymous 10:12 AM I love your statement so much! It truly makes me smile. I struggle with trying to get pregnant, but realize that maybe it isn't God's plan for me. Thank you.
We are praying for you Bobby and Tori enjoy your time together before the baby.Praying for you to Michaela. Your whole family is an inspiration God bless
I’m so excited for them, but will be praying for Michael! Any update from her and Brandon? Last we heard she had a blockage in her Fallopian tube cleared, but that was like 9 months ago.
I'm proud of her that she earned a practical degree that will benefit her family. She will most likely homeschool or she can choose to work outside of the house if she wants to or work if it is economically necessary.
Now that she has a degree, she'll always have it. Having a baby doesn't change that. I actually interviewed for a teaching position and got it while pregnant. We shall see what she chooses to do. I'm sure her husband and family will support her in whatever she chooses to do.
It’s probably not tough for Michaela to welcome another niece or nephew, which we know she loves, or to be happy for her sister. You don’t give her enough credit. Do you really think she wishes infertility on her own siblings?
10:15 I don't think 8:52 is implying that Michaela wishes infertility on her own siblings. I can tell you from my own experience what my feelings were when my friends or family had children- I was happy for them and enjoyed spending time with their little ones. But there's no denying that with it came the very painful reminders of my own infertility and with it an element of envy.
My heart breaks for Michaela....I know she says says she is always over joyed every time someone else gets pregnant but I know it just tears her apart too.
She’s only three months pregnant so she wouldn’t be showing much, of at all! Posting a comment saying it looks like someone is pregnant, or looks like they’re covering something is rude.
I think it's a bit of shame that she did all that hard work over 4 years to graduate with the best qualifications she could, only to get pregnant straight away. She'll never hold down a job now.
How do you know that? Last I checked, Whitney, Erin, and Alyssa all "hold down jobs" so obviously the Bates don't believe that once a woman has a child she HAS to be a SAHM and do nothing else and never ever work for pay.
And even if the parents DID believe that they're obviously not enforcing that belief on their grown, married, adult children.
Or maybe she will. Whitney has. Not to mention, if being a mom is what she wants, what a beautiful job! And now she will always have a degree in her back pocket if she needs it.
I disagree. We have no idea what she wants and where she will teach. I have a friend who had her 3 children right after finishing and now, 8 yrs later, just started at a public school, never having taught previously. The school was grateful for a substitute and has helped her freshen up her skills. 1) Tori may have just enjoyed learning. 2) She may have wanted extra knowledge for homeschooling her own children. 3) She may want to teach at church. 4) She may want to teach in a co-op.
I wouldn't judge her if she worked full time but I do hope she only works part time at most and stays home with her children. I think it's great for the kids and wish more people would put their kids first in that way if they could afford to. I don't care if it's politically incorrect to say this. I remember how loved I felt when my mom turned down a promotion at work so she wouldn't have to work as much so she could be with me more.
Bobby could stay home with the baby - he’s equally a parent, after all. Or they could lean on daycare or family or friends. Millions of women in the US work with children. And teachers have lots of time off.
12:24....your statement is condescending towards working mothers. I do put my children first. And that is why I work. Why??? Because working enables them to EAT! My husband and I both work to pay the mortgage, save money for future, eat food, pay our bills, and save for college. My children feel no less love than any other.
Heidi, 12:24 said if people can afford it then its better for one of the parents to be home. From your comments lately you don't seem to be in the greatest mood.
Maybe she'll find a job in a school with infant care. Teachers from my daughter's school have done job sharing when they had young children. Two teachers worked part time sharing 1 job. One of our principals started her new position when she was pregnant with her last child. That child is now almost in middle school and her mom has been in her position for over 10 years.
I'm sure Tori will do what she feels is right for her family.
I m super exited for them. Congrats !!! I m sad for Michael, her sister is married since 5 months and she is already pregnant. Hope she will be the next
This is pretty par for the course for the Bates and Duggars, though. Tori is due in November, so she actually got pregnant a couple months after her wedding, not on the honeymoon like many of the Duggars did. That's one of the whole points of getting married for them. I'm pretty sure they would say "if you're not ready to have children, then you're not ready to marry" and I actually agree with that. Even couples who plan to use BC have to realize there is always a chance that BC could fail and they could wind up with a baby.
And yes I realize there are the exceptions of Michael, who has disclosed she is suffering from infertility, and Jinger, who married a man with a more mainstream belief system and who likely did deliberately wait a year (but there's no actual proof she did, just speculation).
8:32, Jeremy said it on the show a little while after they got married. He said something like they were planning on starting a family “next year” which would be this year
I'm sure this news is bittersweet for Michaela, and Brandon as well. (BTW, I've noticed people tend to focus on how Michaela is suffering, but not Brandon, as if he must not care because he's a man. I think that's a little unfair to him.)
But I also think Tori and Bobby deserve some congrats of their own, and not just "congrats I guess, but I wish it had been Michaela and Brandon instead". Let them have their moment.
That might be because Michaella tends to verbalize her pain more. Also the infertility problem seems to be on Michaellas side as infertility runs on her side of the family. (Not from her parents, but her aunt and uncle had a hard time getting pregnant, and Erin had her blood clotting disorder), so that aspect of it os even more painful for her I think.
Michaella has nothing to do with Tori. Geez just be happy for her, she shouldn’t be ashamed to get pregnant or have to hide it just because her sister is struggling with infertility.
I agree!!! Tori should be able to express the same joy as any other pregnant woman. I think that the Bates siblings have been considerate of Michaela's feelings, but shouldn't have to walk on eggshells around her. Let them live their lives.
Completely agree with you,I'm struggling to get pregnant,but I'm always happy to hear someones happy news,I would be very upset if someone decided not to tell me they where pregnant because of my fertility problems
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IK KNEW IT!!!!
ReplyDeleteCongratulation another beautiful Bates baby
ReplyDeleteI called it. Continued prayers for Michaela.
ReplyDeleteBabies and children are of course a blessing, but they’re not the only thing in life. Michaela and Brandon can live full lives of purpose without procreating. From the crowd that often says everything is god’s will and god has a reason for everything, why be so unaccepting of what god is clearly doing (by not doing) in this couple’s life?
DeleteI think that you can live a full life without children. However, that usually happens when a couple makes the active choice not to procreate. It's heartbreaking when you cannot add to your family when every fiber of your being yearns to be a mother (or father).
DeleteBased on show episodes, Michaela is struggling with her infertility and using her faith to cope. Trying to figure out why she can't have children isn't challenging God's will, it's determining if she or Brandon has a medical condition that prevents it. The Keilens even seem reluctant to undergo any fertility procedures like IVF. Michaela seems open to adoption, so that may be where God is directing their lives.
Anonymous 10:12 AM I love your statement so much! It truly makes me smile. I struggle with trying to get pregnant, but realize that maybe it isn't God's plan for me. Thank you.
DeleteWe are praying for you Bobby and Tori enjoy your time together before the baby.Praying for you to Michaela. Your whole family is an inspiration God bless
DeleteI’m so excited for them, but will be praying for Michael! Any update from her and Brandon? Last we heard she had a blockage in her Fallopian tube cleared, but that was like 9 months ago.
ReplyDeleteYes agreed! And i wonder too
DeleteAww!! Did they say when they’re due?
ReplyDeleteNovember
DeleteWhat about her teaching career?
ReplyDeleteShe’ll probably use her knowledge to homeschool her kids
DeleteDid we really thing she would teach?
DeleteWhat about it?
DeleteShe WILL use her degree.
DeleteShe didn't get it for no reason. She is young and there is plenty of years ahead to use her degree.
I'm proud of her that she earned a practical degree that will benefit her family. She will most likely homeschool or she can choose to work outside of the house if she wants to or work if it is economically necessary.
DeleteNow that she has a degree, she'll always have it. Having a baby doesn't change that. I actually interviewed for a teaching position and got it while pregnant. We shall see what she chooses to do. I'm sure her husband and family will support her in whatever she chooses to do.
DeleteWow! Congrats Tori and Bobby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations to Tori and Bobby but my heart breaks for Michaela. It's has to be tough.
ReplyDeleteIt’s probably not tough for Michaela to welcome another niece or nephew, which we know she loves, or to be happy for her sister. You don’t give her enough credit. Do you really think she wishes infertility on her own siblings?
Delete10:15 I don't think 8:52 is implying that Michaela wishes infertility on her own siblings. I can tell you from my own experience what my feelings were when my friends or family had children- I was happy for them and enjoyed spending time with their little ones. But there's no denying that with it came the very painful reminders of my own infertility and with it an element of envy.
DeleteCongrats. That didn’t take long👶
ReplyDeleteMy heart breaks for Michaela....I know she says says she is always over joyed every time someone else gets pregnant but I know it just tears her apart too.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree. As someone who has struggled, my heart goes out to her.
DeleteYou don’t know what is in her mind and heart; you couldn’t know that. How rude to presume to know how she feels, and not to take her at her word.
DeleteThey always say it's up to God. Maybe they never expected to be in this situation.
Delete10:16 -- You do know that a person can be happy for others, while at the same time feeling sad for herself, right?
DeleteGreat news ! I wish they said more about the baby & how things are going. How soon is soon ?? Life must be a blast living in this family !
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness! Congradulations on your little blessing!
ReplyDeleteSo excited for them. They will be awesome parents! :)
ReplyDeleteI said she was hiding something and everyone got crazy about it. Turns out I was right.
ReplyDeleteShe’s only three months pregnant so she wouldn’t be showing much, of at all! Posting a comment saying it looks like someone is pregnant, or looks like they’re covering something is rude.
DeleteI think it's a bit of shame that she did all that hard work over 4 years to graduate with the best qualifications she could, only to get pregnant straight away. She'll never hold down a job now.
ReplyDeleteJudge much?
DeleteHow do you know that? Last I checked, Whitney, Erin, and Alyssa all "hold down jobs" so obviously the Bates don't believe that once a woman has a child she HAS to be a SAHM and do nothing else and never ever work for pay.
DeleteAnd even if the parents DID believe that they're obviously not enforcing that belief on their grown, married, adult children.
I thought the same thing. I really wanted to see her be a teacher.
DeleteWhy? I know alot of mom's that hold full-time jobs. Just because she is pregnant doesn't mean she can't work...
DeleteExactly.
DeleteOr maybe she will. Whitney has. Not to mention, if being a mom is what she wants, what a beautiful job! And now she will always have a degree in her back pocket if she needs it.
DeleteI disagree. We have no idea what she wants and where she will teach. I have a friend who had her 3 children right after finishing and now, 8 yrs later, just started at a public school, never having taught previously. The school was grateful for a substitute and has helped her freshen up her skills. 1) Tori may have just enjoyed learning. 2) She may have wanted extra knowledge for homeschooling her own children. 3) She may want to teach at church. 4) She may want to teach in a co-op.
DeleteTori didn't get her degree for no reason. She has her whole life ahead of her to be teaching.
DeleteI wouldn't judge her if she worked full time but I do hope she only works part time at most and stays home with her children. I think it's great for the kids and wish more people would put their kids first in that way if they could afford to. I don't care if it's politically incorrect to say this. I remember how loved I felt when my mom turned down a promotion at work so she wouldn't have to work as much so she could be with me more.
DeleteBobby could stay home with the baby - he’s equally a parent, after all. Or they could lean on daycare or family or friends. Millions of women in the US work with children. And teachers have lots of time off.
Delete12:24....your statement is condescending towards working mothers. I do put my children first. And that is why I work. Why??? Because working enables them to EAT! My husband and I both work to pay the mortgage, save money for future, eat food, pay our bills, and save for college. My children feel no less love than any other.
DeleteThat's a huge assumption, 11:51. Perhaps she'll work part time when her kids are in school or full time when she's an empty nester.
DeleteHeidi, 12:24 said if people can afford it then its better for one of the parents to be home. From your comments lately you don't seem to be in the greatest mood.
DeleteMaybe she'll find a job in a school with infant care. Teachers from my daughter's school have done job sharing when they had young children. Two teachers worked part time sharing 1 job. One of our principals started her new position when she was pregnant with her last child. That child is now almost in middle school and her mom has been in her position for over 10 years.
DeleteI'm sure Tori will do what she feels is right for her family.
Congratulations Bobby and Tori! I can't wait for your baby to get here.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations Tori and Bobby!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations from Aussie fans xx
ReplyDeleteCongratulations Bobby and Tori so excited for you. Can't wait to see what your having
ReplyDeleteI m super exited for them. Congrats !!!
ReplyDeleteI m sad for Michael, her sister is married since 5 months and she is already pregnant. Hope she will be the next
A little to fast.they should have waited longer
ReplyDeleteThis is pretty par for the course for the Bates and Duggars, though. Tori is due in November, so she actually got pregnant a couple months after her wedding, not on the honeymoon like many of the Duggars did. That's one of the whole points of getting married for them. I'm pretty sure they would say "if you're not ready to have children, then you're not ready to marry" and I actually agree with that. Even couples who plan to use BC have to realize there is always a chance that BC could fail and they could wind up with a baby.
DeleteAnd yes I realize there are the exceptions of Michael, who has disclosed she is suffering from infertility, and Jinger, who married a man with a more mainstream belief system and who likely did deliberately wait a year (but there's no actual proof she did, just speculation).
You think you know better than God’s timing?
DeleteWhy? I don't understand why people feel it's proper to tell a couple when to have children and how many to have. It really isn't any of our business.
Delete11:34, actually Jinger and Jeremy SAID they were waiting, so it wasn’t just speculation
DeleteWhen did Jinger and Jeremy say that?
Delete8:32, Jeremy said it on the show a little while after they got married. He said something like they were planning on starting a family “next year” which would be this year
DeletePoor Michel!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations to Tori and Bobby on your bundle of joy
ReplyDeleteAwe! I am so excite for y'all.
ReplyDeleteThat will be one beautiful baby with such beautiful parents.
I'm sure this news is bittersweet for Michaela, and Brandon as well. (BTW, I've noticed people tend to focus on how Michaela is suffering, but not Brandon, as if he must not care because he's a man. I think that's a little unfair to him.)
ReplyDeleteBut I also think Tori and Bobby deserve some congrats of their own, and not just "congrats I guess, but I wish it had been Michaela and Brandon instead". Let them have their moment.
That might be because Michaella tends to verbalize her pain more. Also the infertility problem seems to be on Michaellas side as infertility runs on her side of the family. (Not from her parents, but her aunt and uncle had a hard time getting pregnant, and Erin had her blood clotting disorder), so that aspect of it os even more painful for her I think.
DeleteTime 3:03PM Fri 5/11/18
ReplyDeleteMy guess was wrong about Nathan getting into another courtship. So congrats on the Smiths.
Such lovely news,I will continue to pray for Michael to have a baby too
ReplyDeleteMichaella has nothing to do with Tori. Geez just be happy for her, she shouldn’t be ashamed to get pregnant or have to hide it just because her sister is struggling with infertility.
ReplyDeleteI agree!!! Tori should be able to express the same joy as any other pregnant woman. I think that the Bates siblings have been considerate of Michaela's feelings, but shouldn't have to walk on eggshells around her. Let them live their lives.
DeleteCompletely agree with you,I'm struggling to get pregnant,but I'm always happy to hear someones happy news,I would be very upset if someone decided not to tell me they where pregnant because of my fertility problems
Delete