Producer: "Chad, have you been informed on what part you're playing in Carlin's wedding?"
Erin Paine (laughing): "I was saving that for right now."
Do you remember Zach Bates using the term "volun-told" on a past episode of Bringing Up Bates? Well, being "volun-told" for a task seems to be common in the Bates family. In this clip, Erin "volun-tells" Chad that he is going to build a stage for Carlin's wedding. And Chad looks thrilled, doesn't he?
Photo/video courtesy of UPtv
He looks serious.😀
ReplyDeleteAwww poor Chad! He’s always put to work!
ReplyDeleteChad looks exhausted and not particularly happy. Maybe they should hire someone and give him a break.
ReplyDeleteMO- Amen! :o)
DeleteOh, poor Chad! This can't be the first time though, right?
ReplyDeleteI often feel sorry for Chad. Yes he is talented and can do everything but they expect to much from him. He must work 24/7. The man needs some downtime. Sounds like another outside wedding.
ReplyDeleteI agree. He works outside the home and Erin always talks about how much he helps around the house too. Sounds like he’s taking on too much work and it’s going to negatively affect his family down the line if they don’t create more of a balance of work between wife and husband.
DeleteChad seems to be working constantly. In contrast, Erin admits she spends days at home in her pajamas. This is not fair to Chad.
DeleteIf Erin has three children, she is also working constantly!
DeleteNo, Erin and Chad have three children, so they are both working constantly raising them. In addition, Chad has a physically demanding job on top of his job as a father. So now he needs to build a stage?
Delete"If Erin has three children,. . ."
DeleteSince when are they only Erin's chldren? That is disrespectful to Chad. He has the important job of raising them, too.
10:16, the majority of the child raising is being done by Erin, obviously. In addition, Erin has a physically demanding job of cleaning, laundry, running errands, and cooking. Both of them work hard.
DeleteErin says she stays in her pajamas for days. That's really not the same as going out and framing a house! But just as Erin takes her breaks from childcare, she needs to give Chad a break too. The poor guy looks angry. I suspect things might not be well in paradise.
DeleteMy husbands wears that dazed looking unhappy face when he's exhausted too. Poor Chad he has such a willing servant heart but does he know how to say 'no I've reached my limits?'
ReplyDeleteI agree with the above 5 posts. Chad is a saint!
ReplyDeleteAlways be careful not to take a spouse's generous heart for granted. Ask first.
ReplyDeleteErin needs to outgrow that 'my husband will do it' mindset. It is obvious that this grown woman has no idea what it is like to actually have to go out and work a job every day. She is still quite immature IMO.
ReplyDeleteMy mother used to say some women treat their husbands like work horses. Well, you still have to feed, water and REST that horse or else it will collapse. Chad also needs to develop a back bone and let Erin know that he is not the family servant. Let the groom's family do something perhaps? He should have married Jana Duggar.
I think we can agree that Chad is a hard worker and bends over backwards for his extended family. Also, Erin should not have surprised him on camera about the stage construction . However, your comment applies that a SAHM has no idea what it means to "work a job". I've worked outside the home as well as was a SAHM. I can assure you that being at home is 24/7 exhausting pressure, with no paycheck. There is no reprieve. Going to a regular job was a piece of cake by comparison. You make it sound like the man has the hardest role.
Delete@5:34 I stay home with my 5 small children. I’ve never been employed since motherhood. However my mom stayed home when my sister and I were babies, then proceeded to be employed at a VA hospital as a clinical coordinator for the remainder of my time at home. She has told me countless times that her time as a SAHM was WAY more taxing than her time as a mother working outside the home. Everyone I know who has done both roles says the same thing.
DeleteQuite immature? Taking care of a house and three small children can be exhausting! I did my stint working outside the home before my first child was born. I would way rather be at home, but it is also a lot of work! I know there are lazy SAHM's, just like there are lazy employees, but Erin has happy, healthy children, a beautiful home, a musical gift that she uses regularly, and people who love her cooking. Sounds like she certainly does her fair share!
DeleteI disagree with the blanket statement that being a SAHM is harder than an outside job. Depends on the job. If you're an attorney or some other high stress job -- no way.
Delete@5:51 I see what you mean, but I don’t think it’s a blanket statement. I will agree that with something like law, a person could feel a lot of stress to win and make money off of it. However I never said SAHMs are most stressed. I said their work is the most taxing.
DeleteBeing a SAHM without taking shortcuts is more time-consuming and mentally tiring than an hourly career, because there is nothing you can do to stop the workload ever. Until someone dies. Haha
My dad is the president of a coal facility here in WV. He oversees the operation of coal mines, tests coal and mineral samples, ships, opens up new plants nationally and internationally, organizes all operations of THOSE plants, goes on difficult trips to oversee those plants multiple times a month, deals with several lawsuits as the coal industry is dying and other companies bankrupt and can’t pay him, deals with ever changing environmental laws, and more that I don’t even know about. I truly cannot think of anyone with more on their plate, career-wise, but in the rare moments I’m with him, he always tells me he has no idea how I do what I do as a SAHM, because the work seems too demanding.
I don’t even mind if women choose to work outside the home. That’s their business. But people who see what is truly done each day at home—being up all through the night with babies, getting up at 5 anyway, homemade meals and snacks, homeschooling, child correction, character building, household work, farm/garden work, running all errands with children in tow, knowing that many little people are depending on you to shape them into loving, kind, bright adults—the mental and physical overstimulation never ends. Clearly, nothing I listed is as physically strenuous as lumberjacking or as corporately stressful as law, BUT what I listed is a vague picture of a life that is neverendingly about service to others and denial of self, 24/7, without a silent car ride’s break home from work to catch your breath.
Staying at home without compromise isn’t the most occupationally stressful. It’s just harder in a different way, and I literally know no one who’s done both or seen both and disagrees, including female friends.
That being said, being a SAHM does not make a person better than another, just the same way a woman having a high-stress career doesn’t make her better than another.
I am so disappointed in this. Don't get me wrong - I love this family - however, why do they need a "stage" for a wedding? I noticed that the venue packages at Carlin's venue begin at just over $9000. Perhaps she can downsize her wedding spectacluar to avoid adding stress to her volun-tolds and scale back on the unnecessary details. I am certain that at $9000 plus dollars, the happy couple, breathtaking scenary and covenant vow to God should suffice. Shame on you Carlin and Kelly!
ReplyDeleteThe stage is so that people can see the wedding better.
DeleteErin volunteered Chad so why shame on Carlin?
DeleteI think they were talking about Chad building the stage before they booked the venue. Maybe they don’t need it now.
Delete7:27 because Carlin wants the best dramatic wedding of the history of weddings ever instead of a beautiful simple godly wedding. Too much pressure on everything being just right.
DeleteAt 7:27, I don’t think the pressure to make it the “ most dramatic wedding of the history of weddings” comes from Carlin. I think the parents on both sides have more to do with that. I think Carlin would elope if she knew she could get away with it.
DeleteI ammend my comment stating "shame on you Carlin". You are right, Carlin is not the one behind these grandeouse schemes. Perhaps Erin and Kelly go overboard on planning because they had typical weddings. Anyway. I still feel like Chad is taken advantage of - a part of me wants to tell him "Man-up!" but that would not actually be the godly way of showing masculine strenght. His constant willingness to defer to "the ladies" like a gentleman is a true testimony of his character/
DeleteEach courtship, engagement and wedding seems like a “ can you top this” contest.
ReplyDeleteI agree!
DeleteDuring Season 7 and so far in Season 8, Kelly Jo has come up with most of the ideas for engagement venues in far off places, and allowing for travel to bridal shops.
DeleteI wish they could get back to the simplicity of the earlier weddings like Erin’s.
DeleteErin seems a tiny bit spoiled and entitled. Does she ask Chad if he wants to spend his free time building something? Also, her idea about building with pallets seems so naive! Watching this clip is a bit hard, you can't help but feel sorry for Chad!
ReplyDeleteChad sounds like one of those guys that would do anything for his family and anyone but he looks exhausted from all the work he does. Erin should ask and not take advantage of his nice character, he looks like he needs a break.
ReplyDeleteI hope Erin learns not to take advantage of her husband's good nature. It seems like he's spent a great deal of time redecorating and working on quite a few major home projects in the short time since they've been married.
ReplyDelete(How many times has he repainted their walls?) She should be careful when it comes to volunteering him to help out the family. This clip was disappointing.
The Bates family as a whole is lovely. My husband and I watch every week and are genuinely happy for them all. That said, we were disappointed in Erin's comment 2 weeks ago when she criticized Josie's wedding hoop! Josie had a contractor make it, and simply needed a truck to collect it. Erin basically said it was too much to ask and more than Josie needed! However, when Erin gets an IDEA, everyone else has to jump through HOOPS!
ReplyDeleteI think Erin’s smiling all the time is a cover up. I’ve seen times when Chad has made comments and her facial expressions changed to that” I don’t like that look”. She’s mentioned how he paints her toenails and clean the house. She should be ashamed of how she treats him a times.
DeleteI defend Josie because she does not make fun of the others. Josie and Kelton show only respect and kindness toward everyone with whom they interact. Why the producers made a foolish scene about collecting the hoop disappointed me. A rope to tie the hoop inside the truck bed would have been the intelligent approach. Josie did not ask for much more like Tori's enchanted tree forest on her wedding day, which was beautiful, but much more work-intensive for the family.
DeleteI love all the kids... we're family friends for years,and Josie is mature,down to earth and low maintenance.
DeleteWe loved the simplicity of her wedding! (now about that heat ;))
Thanks for your reply. I wish Zach and Erin would not criticize their siblings. During Season 7 and so far in Season 8, Kelly Jo has come up with most of the ideas for engagement venues in far off places, and allowing for travel to bridal shops.
DeleteErin doesn't seem to notice Chad's reaction. She just laughs.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like Erin is offering Chad's services and she is offering to pay for the stage. I think this should hve been discussed with Chad first, off camera. When she asks him oncamera, it's hard for him to say no.
ReplyDeleteI love Erin's laugh. Chad loves to build. It will all be good!
ReplyDeleteKom
He builds five days a week. Maybe on Saturday he'd like to rest or play with his kids.
DeleteChad looks resentful.
ReplyDelete