Sunday, March 22, 2020

Stood Up By Gil

Kelly Bates tells the story of her first "date" with Gil

"I was determined to show him that I was mad about that. He said, 'Why are you so mad at me?' And I told him that story."

-Kelly Jo Bates

You may have heard Gil and Kelly Bates talk about this on a previous episode of Bringing Up Bates, but it has been a while. They recently filmed a Bates Love Legends clip discussing their first date, or lack thereof. Gil stood Kelly up! Hear how it happened in the video below.


Photo/video courtesy of UPtv

20 comments:

  1. It’s pretty awesome that Gil & Kelly’s relationship began with forgiveness <3 Many people run into marriage without realizing mistakes & hurt will happen no matter what... what matters is how you handle those moments.

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  2. Oh Gill!!! So happy Kelly forgave your and you have lived happily ever after:)

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  3. Let’s see on Valentine’s Day we learned “papa bill” nearly ran over “grandma Jane” so what do you do when run a girl over? “take em home”. Brandon’s sister told him to “notice Michael” after 5 years. And, Gil literally forgot the date he made with kelly jo. I must have my bar set to high because if I’m run over, overlooked, and/or forgotten I’m moving on!

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    1. Haha! Totally agree!

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    2. I have to agree with 1:40. These stories are not very endearing. And Katie said in the post about she and Travis “I’m obsessed”. Obsession is not love nor is it healthy. Just agreeing with those on here who are happy the couples appear to happy, but reality tv isn’t real life.

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  4. I think Gill showed Kelly that he really wanted to be forgiven, actually cried. I think it's easier to forgive someone who demonstrates that they are really, truly sorry. If Gill had said at the time "Ya, I forgot, get over it, I made a mistake, ok! Can't go back and undo it, Relax"...I think there would've been a different outcome. It's all how you acknowledge how your mistake affected the other person.

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    1. Crying is actually a form of manipulation( I’m a therapist,btw). Its a cycle used frequently by abusers. I am in no way, shape, or form suggesting Gil abused in any way. I am saying “crying” in itself is not an indicator of repentance. While I am happy Gil and Kelly Jo have a successful marriage, the fact Gil “made a special date” in which he completely forgot and did not contact Kelly Jo for 2 weeks and ultimately had to be reminded are huge red flags within most dating situations. I am hoping some young impressionable readers do not wait around for “Prince Charming” to notice them because it seems a “cute” story by this reality show family.

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  5. Love your family. I wish friends of mine who recently got divorced would have known about God. They dated for 9 yrs then married and divorced 2 yrs later. What a difference it is that having God inbetween makes a difference.

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    1. 6:46- I've known quite a few couples over the years whose religion and God were very important to them, yet they still ended up getting divorced. The opposite is also true- I know many couples, included my husband and I, who do not attend any church at all but have been happily married for a long time. I think one of the main factors that cause marriages to fail is having unrealisitic expectations from the start.

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  6. Oh my goodness! That is a terrible story! For Gil to completely forget he had made a date that was so very important to Kelly, is so sad. And for Gil to still be clueless after not being in touch for two weeks with a girl he professed to care about is unconscionable. I should think that if he had even thought of Kelly once, he would have remembered his mistake. I would have to ask God for a great deal more patience and forgiveness to be even half the woman Kelly is.

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    1. MO- You're all a lot softer-hearted than I am. I wouldn't have accepted Gil's apology after forgetting about a date and not contacting me for two weeks. When I was single, that would have made me see a big red flag waving in front of me. I'm happy it worked out so well for them. :o)

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    2. I mean, they were probably 20 years old. You're not a mature adult at that age.

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    3. In her place I would have really been upset and tempted to not forgive him, but the older me realizes that a big part of marriage is accepting each other's faults and loving each other anyway.

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  7. Awe love them as a couple!

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  8. So, they were allowed to attend a real college, live in a dorm with others; have independence and DATE alone with each other. They are prime examples of how it's not necessary to isolate your children from life and still these two worked out, married and didn't lose their faith. Why can't they do that for their children?

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    1. I believe that after they were married, they embraced the IBLP doctrine, which discourages secular education or allowing your adult children to leave home, unless they're married. Daughters are supposed to live under the authority of their father until they have husband. Then he's in charge. I'm not sure if the older Bates' sons still live at home or not, so maybe they have a different expectation for them.

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  9. He "made a really special date" and then he "forgot I'd made it."? This doesn't make any sense. If he'd planned something special (restaurant reservations, tickets to a show) he would not have completely forgotten.

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    1. Not only forgotten it! Forgotten it for at least 2 weeks! Did he not think of her from time to time? I wish I’d never heard that story.

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    2. Exactly@11:11! Didn’t even contact Kelly Jo for 2 weeks! That’s not an “oops, I forgot I made a special date for us” that’s “I’m not even thinking about you”!

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  10. Sound so much like my parents while they where in college where they both went to,dad asked mom out and forgot the date he had planned as he had apparently make the plans on the weekend he was going home to visit his family and grandma who was batteling cancer,Mom did understand and did forgive him,After two or three weeks,this was in 1978 i think.

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